January 2017 Album Round Up!

Greetings to all you lovebirds out there 😉

If you’ve got a special someone in your life, hope you and your bank account are gearing up for some good ol’ Valentine’s Day lovin’ next week . If that special someone is still finding their way to you, or if they already did and you fucking blew it, hope the ice cream, tears, and rom com re-runs are good to you. But for most of the single guys out there, hope you enjoy another typical Tuesday with a pointless cultural label where getting laid might be slightly easier.

As for me, I hope to spend Valentine’s Day VERY erotically – listening to that new Marilyn Manson record he’s hinted at (literally the opposite of coincidentally) releasing on that day. It’s supposed to be called Say10. If that title doesn’t strike a chord with you, slowly pronounce it out loud until it clicks. Don’t worry, it took me an embarrassing amount of time to put two and two together, too.

So while you make the necessary preparations (read: purchases) for a drama-free and sex-filled Valentine’s Day, here are some thoughts on what the first month of 2017 had to offer music-wise! We’re off to a pretty good start if you ask me!

Forever – Code Orange

 The hottest act in Metalcore unleashed their third record this month to frenzied excitement. Me? Just a contrarian son of a bitch, I guess. I LIKE album – furious cuts like “Real”, “Spy” and the title track are bone-crushing rushes of adrenaline, and my biggest praise is the LP’s mindboggling variety, with “Bleeding In the Blur” bringing some melodic Post-Hardcore to the table and “Ugly” fusing together ‘90s Alt-Rock with gruff Hard Rock – but the barrage of not-so-special breakdowns does get tiresome and a couple cuts (“The Mud”, “Hurt Goes On”) miss their mark. So yeah. Cool record but I didn’t go head-over-heels for it like everybody else did. Here is a full review. RECOMMENDED

Vessels – Starset

 I went against the grain with this new Starset record too, the band’s second. Vessels fuses together Electronic Music, Butt Rock, and some djent-y modern Metalcore for a sugar sweet but unfulfilling outing full of excessively angsty hooks, non-guitar riffs, and such a thick layer of production that it’s impossible to tell if a single thing is performed by a human being. It’s unbelievably catchy at points, and I understand the appeal, but it’s not gonna be anything more than an occasional guilty pleasure for me. Here is a full review. NOT RECOMMENDED

Return of the Cool – Nick Grant

After stumbling across this Billboard article on Nick Grant last year, Return of the Cool quickly became one of my most anticipated debuts of 2017. With the momentum the 28-year-old Grant has behind him right now, I was ready to bear witness to the meteoric rise of Hip-Hop’s next breakout star – and most of all, I was ready to hear soul and lyricism reinstated in Southern Hip-Hop (not to say I dislike what’s going on down there right now, but, I did grow up with ATLIENS as my bible). On Return of the Cool, the South Carolina native shows some promise and a bit of an old school flair, but the project disappointed the hell out of me. The painfully generic “Bouncin’” could’ve been made by ANY of Grant’s contemporaries (Logic, J. Cole, Big Sean Kendrick, etc.). And despite references to icons like Lauryn Hill and Nas, Grant doesn’t do much to uphold their standards with lines like “curves driving me crazy, I need some counseling”. NOT RECOMMENDED

The Search For Everything (Wave One) – John Mayer

 My fellow Pretentious Fairfield County, CT Douchebag is employing an adventurous and exciting release strategy for his seventh LP – he’s releasing four songs at a time in monthly “waves”. In the uncertain and uneasy free-for-all that is music promotion in 2017, I’m so glad to see someone with Mayer’s clout try a different approach. As for the music on “Wave One”? Simply put, three out of four songs connected for me. Most notably, however, I was psyched to see Mayer take a break from the genre gymnastics of his last few releases and just pen some straight ahead, no frills Pop tunes. Here is a full review. RECOMMENDED

Machine Messiah – Sepultura

 Growing up, I thought all you had to know about Sepultura occurred in the less-than-4-hour combined run time of Beneath the Remains, Chaos A.D., Arise, and Roots. I still sorta feel that way, but I was curious to hear Machine Messiah, which is now the band’s eighth (!) as Sepultura 2.0 since Derrick Green took over on vocals in 1997 (by comparison, they only made six LPs with Max Cavalera). So I felt behind.And I gotta say, I’m impressed with this current incarnation’s mix of Thrash, Groove Metal, a bit of Extreme Metal,, and the most thrilling surprise, a symphonic element on tracks like “Sworn Oath” and “Resistant Parasites”! Worth checking out if you’re like me and have only ever known “classic Sepultura”. Here is a full review. RECOMMENDED

 Culture – Migos

Around 20 million people were watching the Golden Globes when, two weeks before the release of their sophomore album, Donald Glover unexpectedly shouted out the Migos during an acceptance speech (his PHENOMENAL tv show Atlanta took home two awards that night). And with Culture, it’s safe to say the Migos are seizing their moment in the sun. This LP is the EPITOME of the Atlanta-based trap sound: Quavo, Offset, and Takeoff hop on these knocking instrumentals (one of the best collections of trap beats I have ever heard) with colorful ad-libs, tons of charisma, and memorable refrains. I mean, how could you not just throw on a track like “T-Shirt” or “Call Casting” and vibe out? Historically , I’m into Rap like this, so I’m gonna need some more time with it, but Culture just might be an unexpected 2017 favorite. RECOMMENDED

Gods of Violence – Kreator

 On album number fourteen from the legendary German thrashers, they delivered a collection of powerhouse Metal anthems and did so without being restricted by that old school Thrash “leash” that some of their veteran peers seem to be hindered by. As with its predecessor Phantom Antichrist, Gods of Violence draws on not just Thrash but Melodic Death Metal, streaks of classic NWOBHM, and a bit of lyrical inspiration from Viking Metal for a well-rounded listen. Here is a full review. HIGHLY RECOMMENDED

I See You – The xx

The third LP from these British indie poppers is chalk full of seductive nocturnal vibes that range from slightly spacey (“A Violent Noise”) to hipster nightclub-y (“Dangerous”) to just plain heart-wrenching (“Performance). While these guys’ music has never really “clicked” with me, I actually found myself enjoying a good chunk of this album! Unfortunately, one thing that bugs me is how overwhelmingly seriously these guys take themselves – at times, they oversell their emotions in an almost histrionic fashion that leaves me feeling a bit drained, like I’m not allowed to enjoy myself or something. Plus, Romy and Oliver just AREN’T the best singers from a technical standpoint. But it’s still a solid LP, definitely The xx’s best yet! RECOMMENDED

AFI (The Blood Album) – AFI

 Call it nostalgia, call it glass half full, call it “a retard who knows nothing about anything” like you all love to do on YouTube, but AFI fucking BROUGHT it this time around, in a way they haven’t in over a decade! I’m serious. “White Offerings” is PURE Sing the Sorrow (the band’s landmark 2003 release – a childhood favorite of mine), while the sharp riffing in “Hidden Knives” does the song’s title justice, and tracks like “Pink Eyes” and “Snow Cats” have all the makings of hit songs (particularly the latter, with its irresistible call-and-response chorus). I’m just shocked at how into this record I am. The Blood Album is the OGs sending the new bucks back to the drawing board. These songs completely justify my endless shit talking about all these wack ass “emo” bands that are coming up on Warped Tour – this is what they should shoot for. A thoughtful melding of Punk, Post-Hardcore, and Hard Rock, The Blood Album proves that AFI still set the standard. HIGHLY RECOMMENDED

Migration – Bonobo

As easy on the ears as this record is, it DOES tend to drift to the background as you listen to it. The gentle, serene touch of “Break Apart” and the ambience of “Grains” are some of the most pleasant sounds you’re likely to hear from Electronic Music all year, but Migration is not the most outwardly engaging of listens. Of course, you could take that in whatever connotation you’d like! ‘Cause I don’t have any “critiques” here – just my personal experience with this LP, which is that it’s a more passive listen than his early works like Dial “M” for Monkey, which was my favorite album when I was sixteen. Don’t get me wrong – there’s a lot to like here, and it’s 100 percent worth a listen, but it hasn’t gotten much repeated love from me. RECOMMENDED

Ten Albums I’m Anticipating in 2017

Annnd here we are! Another new year, another 365 days of people moping about how awful it is. To be fair, 2016 did give 2017 quite the head start in that category, but I always prefer to be optimistic. Being a whiney whore on social media is too easy. I like a challenge.

Musically, I wouldn’t be surprised if we saw a bit of a drop off in 2017, ‘cause, let’s face it, who DIDN’T come out with an awesome new album in the past two years?? 2015 and 2016 were overwhelming, in the best way imaginable.

But this damn industry always finds a way. And since New Year’s, I’ve been steadily adding to my 2017 release date calendar, salivating at the chance to review and talk about these mysterious LPs that, at the moment, are nothing but titles on a word doc.

So here are ten of those records, all of which are CONFIRMED to come out this year. Being speculative is a waste of time. Sure, Tool MIGHT drop an album before 2017 is over, but I’d rather focus my attention on the “sure things”. Like going to a bar and only talking to girls with tramp stamps.

And one more quick clarification: these albums aren’t necessarily “anticipated” ‘cause I think they’re gonna be good – some I’m just curious to hear! Big difference there!

Can hardly contain my excitement for this new Kreator LP Gods of Violence, which drops in a couple weeks (January 27th). This might be THE major Metal release of January for me. I haven’t kept up with every Kreator album (which they crank out like clockwork), but I’ve never been disappointed by what I’ve heard, so high hopes for this one!

The following week, Big Sean is dropping an album called I Decided. According to him, it’s his “most ambitious one yet” or some other PR nonsense. I always have a morbid curiosity with new Big Sean music, ‘cause there’s a small part of me that thinks the guy’s genuinely talented and wants to see him pull through with a dope project. But it never happens. We’ll have to see…

Hip-Hop’s most pretentious (alleged) Jew hater, Lupe Fiasco, will be dropping Drogas Light on February 10th, following up 2015’s excellent Tetsuo & Youth. Growing up, I worshipped this man. Nowadays, his bars make me feel like I’m being talked down to. But Tetsuo was undeniably great so I can’t wait to hear its successor.

After that T Swift covers album got him heaps more (deserved) recognition, I’m looking forward to what singer/songwriter Ryan Adams has in store for his new LP Prisoner. Check out Love is Hell if you haven’t yet. The guy is unreal.

Everyone has that criminally underrated band from their childhood that they’ll never stop yelling about. For me, that’s Darkest Hour, the unsung heroes of the New Wave of American Heavy Metal who quietly put out two classics (2003’s Undoing Ruin and 2005’s Deliver Us) while Trivium and Lamb of God hogged the spotlight. Though I did get a little vindication when “District Divided”, one of my favorite songs, got 30 seconds of screen time in The Big Short. But I digress

This upcoming record Godless Prophets and the Migrant Flora is the result of a crowd-funding campaign and after Sumerian Records ruined their last album, I’ve got my fingers crossed for a return to form. The title is certainly epic.

Since I’m a HUGE proponent of Metal and Hip-Hop intermingling (even at the cost of Limp Bizkit existing), Ice-T’s Metal band Body Count is always on my radar. Their sixth LP Bloodlust is on its way this St. Patty’s Day. Given that “Pop Bubble”, featuring Hatebreed frontman Jamey Jasta, was far and away the standout track on 2014’s Manslaughter, it’s gonna be Jasta Collab or Bust. Just kidding.

My tears still haven’t quite dried up from the break up of legendary Black Metal band Agalloch last year, but frontman John Haughm is back! His new band is called Pillorian and the record – out March 10th – is called Obsidian Arc. Let us pray to the Black Metal Gods for some continued quality from Mr. Haughm. I can only listen to The Mantle and Marrow of the Spirit so many hundreds of times.

Oh, and Mastodon have confirmed a seventh full-length for 2017! It doesn’t have a title yet, but as far as this obnoxious blogger goes, it sure as shit has an audience! I can’t fucking wait – 2014’s Once More ‘Round the Sun might’ve been my favorite of the band’s six records.

The ever-elusive Wintersun is – I kid you not – ACTUALLY dropping an album. The band’s third in a 13-year career….but, I swear it’s happening. Take a look hereThe Forest Seasons is a title that’s floating around out there, but who knows. Here’s what I DO know: this will be one of the most talked about Metal albums of 2017.

And, last but not least, John Mayer is returning to the limelight with The Search for Everything. And an interesting release strategy , I might add. A Mayer fanboy from early on in life, I’ll be there every step of the way.