St. Patty’s Day Track Round Up

So last Friday was St. Patty’s Day. For me, it was just another Friday – some new music came out, I listened to it, I went to work, I came home, neglected my social obligations, and listened to obscure Metal albums that nobody gives a fuck about. But for some other geniuses out there, local drinking establishments got a nice payday off their desperate need for an “excuse” or an “occasion” to be alcoholics. Look, if you want to get fucked up and escape from your miserable existence for a while, be my guest. But don’t pretend like this is a fucking legitimate holiday. Even if you’re Irish.

Ok, Part 1/1,000,000 of my St. Patty’s Day Rant over. Now, here are my thoughts on some of the biggest tracks released on the most pointless “holiday” of the year.

“At My Best (feat. Hailee Steinfeld)” – Machine Gun Kelly

I swear to God, if I had the cash I’d scramble together a team of the best, Jewiest lawyers I could find and sue Machine Gun Kelly for false advertising. Suffice to say, in this song MGK is not exactly “at his best”. What a fucking bore. Mind-numbingly basic rhyme schemes, dime-a-dozen pasted-in pop hook, hollow self-affirmations….when he delivers cringe-inducing lines like “life is about making mistakes/it’s also about trying to be great” or “this song is for anybody who feels like I did/never the cool kid”….it becomes clear that I would NOT want MGK as my motivational coach. “At My Best” is an incredibly poor excuse for an uplifting, “inspirational song”, something that in the beginning of his career felt genuine but now just feels calculated, robotic, and commodified. NOT RECOMMENDED

“Good Life” – G-Eazy & Kehlani

I gotta say, when placed alongside MGK’s latest lightweight dud, G-Eazy looks like fucking Big Pun here. Joking aside, there’s a bit of surgical rhyming going on here, especially in the second verse when Mr. Eazy sails smoothly through patterns “toast to success/broke and distressed/open my chest/hope for the best”. Even though I’ve always criticized this guy’s music for being bland, generic, and as non-essential as non-essential gets, you HAVE to give him one thing – he comes across incredibly likable. Laid back and easy going, but sincere and hardworking…I’ve never met the guy but this how his personality comes through in his bars. And on this particular track, the stadium-ready hook from Kehlani is totally passable and will probably make for one of the stronger tracks on the Fate of the Furious soundtrack. RECOMMENDED

“Feels Like Summer” – Weezer

Almost a year removed from their excellent return-to-form with the White Album last April, these veteran alt-Rockers are back! And, it’s disappointing. For me, what makes this track a let down is how the crunchy guitars have been replaced by lifeless pop production. It couldn’t get more summer-y than “(Girl We Got a) Good Thing” and “California Kids” anyway, but this track tries to manufacture its way into Warm California Weather Anthem. And it fails. NOT RECOMMENDED

“Battle Symphony” – Linkin Park

So this is single numero dos from Linkin Park’s forthcoming One More Light album. I’ve yet to listen to “Heavy” – all I know is that a lot of people fucking hated it. Well, maybe when I get around to “Heavy” I’ll be the ol’ devil’s advocate, but I’m definitely on the hate bandwagon with “Battle Symphony”. I was shocked when the opening of this track kicked in and there were all these cheesy synths – the song felt like a nightmarish fusion of Imagine Dragons and The Chainsmokers. I suppose the chorus is kind of catchy, but aside from those six notes (Bat-tle Sym-pho-nee-eee), the song is so forgettable. NOT RECOMMENDED

“My Corner (feat. Lil’ Wayne)” – Raekwon

Based on this, I’ll definitely be checking out Raekwon’s new LP The Wild. In the first verse, the Wu-Tang OG makes it perfectly clear that he still murks 80 percent of the new crop of younger MCs. His raspy bars still carry that same weight that they did in the mid-90s, even if the music itself is less vital (Lil Wayne’s appearance is fairly standard, as is the production, which sounds like something Wayne, Rick Ross, Meek Mill, or any G-Unit affiliate would jump on.) Hopefully The Wild will give old school heads something to use those Fire Emojis on, ‘cause I know Drake’s new project sure isn’t! RECOMMENDED

“On the Come Up (feat. Big Sean)” – Mike Will Made-It

Nah. I don’t think Big Sean’s overly hyped-up yelling marries all that well with the operatic vocal sample in the beat. I just always find it funny how Sean delivers his lyrics with this brash, dramatic emphasis as if he’s dropping one mindblowing bar after another. The way his voice inflects on this track, you’d think he’s dropping the verse of the century. But his rhymes are actually REALLY average. I enjoyed some of what he had to say on I Decided, but this one is not doing it for me. NOT RECOMMENDED

“Animal” – Trey Songz

Despite these atrocious lyrics being a laundry list of every corny sexual innuendo on the face of the planet – Trey compares his penis to an anaconda, then a banana, then a boomerang, and then compares the vagina in question to forbidden fruit, a monkey, and SURPRISE, a pussycat – those chromatic guitar chords in the pre-chorus are so fucking sexy. They make everything else tolerable. The raunchy club beat that surrounds them is also hard-hitting and effective. I have to give it to Trey Songz here; depending on America’s tolerance for this kind of filthy sexual content in Pop music (I mean, Nicki Minaj’s “Anaconda” did squeak through), this could be a hit. RECOMMENDED

 

 

Published on Metal Insider!

Hey everyone! Hope your lives are at least – at a bare minimum – trotting along in a relatively uneventful fashion like the stock market has been for the last week (any other investors wondering when something exciting’s gonna happen?). Anyway, I’ve got an announcement– I’ve been brought on by another Metal site as a contributor! Last week, my inaugural article for Metal Insider was published! I reviewed the brand new self-titled record from Obituary, which dropped on St. Patty’s Day.

Metal Insider has had a shortage of reviews lately, so I was thrilled to take a step in helping re-establish that aspect of the site. And I mean c’mon, who doesn’t want to hear a brand new Obituary record a week before everyone else?? It’s like that fucking kid in Elementary School who was the first to get a Gamecube. Well not exactly, but you get my point.

You can read my review here. Every time I rack up a minor “W” like this, it only further motivates me to keep following my passion and cranking out (hopefully somewhat) insightful, entertaining, and unique music writing. Thank you so much for your continued support!

February 2017 Album Round Up!

Wow, we’ve arrived at the First Anniversary of this segment! When I decided to write a post last March recapping all the records I was bumping in February 2016, I had no idea this was going to be a thing. But a year later, it’s become something I look forward to every month. It forces me to point my ears in all directions, and really think CRITICALLY about what I’m hearing, even if I’m not in “full review” mode.

I can only imagine that in another year, when we have our two-year anniversary (whooaaa things are getting serious. I hope all the sex hasn’t dried up by then), I’ll still be cranking these out the same way I am today.

And given that we’ve hit this big milestone, it’s only fitting that I add something new! As you might’ve guessed, I listen to a lot more than 8 – 12 albums every month. But just because I’m too lazy to write about all of them in descriptive detail doesn’t mean I shouldn’t let my feelings be known! So I’ve added a section to these Round Ups where I give a basic “like” or “don’t like” verdict on another batch of the month’s releases….with zero explanation. I guess it’ll be up to you to listen to ‘em and figure out my reasons for your own damn self!

But if you’ve checked out any of these Round Ups so far, thank you so much for your support! Hopefully I’ve turned you on to (or helped you avoid) at least one new album you otherwise might’ve missed. That’s all I’m trying to do here. It’s not rocket science. So if that happened for any of my readers, I couldn’t be happier; this thing is a success.

DROGAS Light – Lupe Fiasco

After 2015’s stunning conceptual project Tetsuo & Youth, Chi town’s most pretentious wordsmith takes an infuriating nosedive into half-witted commercial Hip-Hop. This album was a colossal disappointment for me. I don’t understand why Lupe still feels the need to make Pop-Rap ditties like “Pick Up the Phone” after he was trashed for making an album full of them (2011’s Lasers). In all fairness, DROGAS Light isn’t Lasers Part 2 – tracks like “NGL” and “Made in the USA” have more of a Trap vibe than anything else – but whatever it is, it’s equally uninteresting. In fact, it’s my least favorite Lupe project to date. Here is a full review. NOT RECOMMENDED

Suicide Silence – Suicide Silence

Modern Deathcore frontrunners Suicide Silence decided to shake things up for album number five, bringing in famed Nu Metal producer Ross Robinson and drastically altering their sound. Hey, I’m all for adventurousness – in fact, that’s the only reason I checked this album out. The only problem? It’s one of the worst pieces of shit I have ever heard. Eddie Hermida’s clean “singing” is about as easy to listen to as a Sandy Hook conspiracy theory. What makes things worse is Hermida’s patronizing, dismissive responses to any criticism of this album, claiming that anyone who doesn’t like it “just doesn’t get it” or is “full of hatred” or whatever. He’s like the fucking Donald Trump of shitty Nu Metal. Here is a full review. NOT RECOMMENDED

Flying Micronatal Banana – King Gizzard & the Lizard Wizard

These guys are quickly becoming favorites of mine! This record in particular is an inventive blend of Psychedelic Rock, and Alternative with free-flowing, exploratory musicianship that keeps things interesting all the way through the track list. The eerie hookiness of a cuts like “Sleep Drifter” and “Melting” has made this the most addicting listen of any LP this month. HIGHLY RECOMMENDED

Prisoner – Ryan Adams

One of the most prolific songwriters in all of music came through with a set of painfully relatable tunes that center primarily on heartbreak and loss. Whether or not he intended it to be, it’s the ultimate breakup album. On the musical side of things, the balance between crunchy Heartland Rock, Folk-Rock balladry, and dashes of country is gracefully executed . And I have to particularly praise the impossibly gorgeous clean guitar tones that Ryan achieves throughout this entire thing – they make it worth the listen all on their own. Here is a full review. RECOMMENDED

I Decided. – Big Sean

Upside: with I Decided, Big Sean gave us his strongest project to date, featuring well-thought out concepts, an uncharacteristic amount of introspection, and some familiar clever word-play. Downside: the guy is still churning out horribly generic, Drake-biting songs like “Bounce Back” and “Moves”. Upside: with the sweet chick-swooping ballad “Jump Out the Window” and the stunning “Bigger Than Me”, Sean gave us not only HIS best two songs to date, but two of the best songs of the year. Downside: at one point, he rhymes “Channing Tatum” with “J. J. Abrams” and “Jason Statham”. Ugh. Very frustrating. But like I said, this is his best work to date, and I look forward to what the Detroit spitter does next. Here is a full review. NOT RECOMMENDED

Torment – Six Feet Under

 While there’s nothing outwardly WRONG with the 12th outing from these Death Metal veterans, it’s so painfully meat-and-potatoes that I’m gonna have to pass over it. Which, that more has to do with MY tastes than anything else – it’s more a “me” thing than a “them” thing. But the dumbed-down riffs on a song like “Knife Through the Skull” are mind-numbing for me (who knew ex-Cannibal Corpse frontman Chris Barnes would sing a song called “Knife Through the Skull”? What a plot twist!). I do really enjoy the track “Bloody Underwear” – it brings a bit of a Hardcore mosh sensibility, and it’s a lot of fun! (though the supposedly violent title could just be referring to his special lady’s time of the month…..just saying). Bottom line: if you like your Death Metal stripped to the bone and ultra groovy, you might dig this, but – with as little pretentiousness as possible – it’s just a bit simple for me. NOT RECOMMENDED

Chief – Jidenna

The man behind “Classic Man” proves that he’s anything but a one-hit wonder. On Chief, he’s versatile as hell, one minute pulling together a song like “Trampoline” – the ultimate soundtrack for a private dance at a strip club – and the next minute, commanding your attention with clever, posturing bars on “Long Live the Chief”. And smooth melodies abound, whether it’s the aforementioned “Trampoline”, or it’s the slick balladry of “Bambi”, or the exotic “Adaora”. The melting pot production is worthy of mention too – The Let Out” is like a DS2 Future/DJ Mustard mash-up, “Safari is a R&B/Hip-Hop mixture that The Weeknd would crush, “2 Points” features some punchy horns, “Long Live the Chief” is electro minimalism that oddly works. If only he had left the obligatory post-“One Dance” dancehall song off (“Little Bit More”). But I’ll forgive it, ‘cause this is one promising debut. HIGHLY RECOMMENDED

The Grinding Wheel – Overkill

 The legendary East Coast thrashers followed up 2014’s exceptional White Devil Armory with a record that’s significantly less exceptional, but still passable. This time around, the riffs just felt a bit less punchy and exciting, and the tracks dragged on and on for unnecessary lengths (similar to my gripes with the new Metallica album), which left me feeling underwhelmed. There’s still some bonafide rippers though, like the opener “Mean, Green, Killing Machine”, or “Our Finest Hour”, which has a couple devastating riffs and some shrieking vocals from frontman Bobby “Blitz” Ellsworth. Here is a full review. RECOMMENDED

Gelato – Young Dolph

The only noteworthy moment on this project is the Yo Gotti diss track (“Play Wit Yo Bitch”), which I have to at least commend for the DIRECT, very UN-subliminal nature of the insults, as basic and schoolyard as they are. And one more track I might come back to is “On the River”, because A) “fucked her on the river” is such a hilarious refrain, and B) the beat is HARD. Other than that, Gelato is one of my least favorite Hip-Hop projects I’ve heard this year. It’s got every stereotype that non-Rap fans gleefully shit on – posturing, smoking weed, banging bitches, and of course posturing about smoking weed and banging bitches. Wasn’t anything for me here, especially when Dolph’s rival Yo Gotti brought such FIRE with CM9 recently. NOT RECOMMENDED

Origins – Mutiny Within

The Little Metal Band That Could is still chugging along six years since being dropped from Roadrunner Records due to the disappointing commercial performance of their self-titled debut. I have loved this band since day one – their blend of melodic, keyboard-driven European Metal with the riff-tastic Metalcore of their American counterparts made them the band I wanted to be IN growing up. And Origins, their third LP, turned out to be their best yet! The album effortlessly sways between noodling technicality and accessible – dare I say, slightly Poppy – hooks. It’s probably not for everyone, but it feels tailored EXACTLY to my tastes. HIGHLY RECOMMENDED

 Plato O Plomo – Fat Joe & Remy Ma

So Joey Crack and Remy Ma decided to follow up their vernacular-defining mega-hit “All the Way Up” with a full album,. On Power 105.1’s The Breakfast Club, the two emcees deemed the project a “complete masterpiece” and I strongly disagree. It’s full of a lot of empty boasts, standard gangsta rap bars, and the occasional hilariously clumsy sexism (like the beginning of “Go Crazy”), or lyrically challenged rhyme scheme (Fat Joe rhymes “Narcos” with “Pablo” on “Spaghetti”). There are a couple beats go hard, like the menacing “Swear to God”, or the riled up “Cookin”, but nothing to see here, really. NOT RECOMMENDED

A Few More

Like:

Atonement – Immolation (Death Metal)

The Breaker – Little Big Town (Country)

The Feminine: Act II – Anna Wise

Fin – Syd (R & B)

Drunk – Thundercat (Jazz Fusion)

Dislike:

NAV – NAV (Hip-Hop)

HNDRXX – Future (Hip-Hop, R & B)

 

 

Slayer, Lamb of God, and Behemoth: The Metal Tour of the Summer?

As Metalheads stare down our first summer with President Code Orange in office, our second straight summer without a Mayhem Festival, and our third straight summer without an Uproar Festival (the latter of which…good riddance), we got a big piece of news this past weekend. A piece of news that gives Summer ’17 a bit more meaning than just another three warm months where it’s easier to get laid. This past weekend, a must-see tour was announced: Lamb of God, Behemoth, and Slayer will be hitting the road together.

I can hardly contain my fucking excitement. Somewhere in America there’s a concert promoter who deserves a serious promotion (see what I did there?). This is the kind of lineup where the powers at be could get away with Ticket Price Rape. Not only does this lineup consist of three of Metal’s indisputable giants, but it’s also a) three of Metal’s indisputable giants of the LIVE arena, and b) it brings together three distinct fanbases that strike the perfect balance in terms of overlapping enough as to avoid polarizing the audience, but being different enough to draw headbangers from all walks of life.

I suppose in terms of pure album sales, Behemoth’s going to have to perform first, which is a bit depressing in the way that watching Megadeth go second on the Big Four was. Behemoth – whose last album The Satanist has already worked its way up into my favorite Extreme Metal albums of ALL TIME – are the one band I’ve yet to see live, so catching their set will be priority numero uno. As for Slayer, I haven’t caught a show since the 2010 American Carnage tour, where they played Seasons in the Abyss in its entirety, so I’m due for some thrashin’ about in the pit to a more well-rounded set. And Lamb of God….I saw them last spring and they fucking destroyed – provided they’ve tweaked their setlist a bit, I’ll be just as stoked to see them this time around.

Start saving your money NOW. Spend a sober weekend away from the bar, break up with your girlfriend right before her birthday….do whatever it takes to set aside the cash, ‘cause this is NOT a show you will want to miss. And if you’re somehow inexcusably behind the eightball on any these three bands, familiarize yourself with their catalogues – not only will your concert experience be greatly enhanced, but so will your overall quality of life.

Supposedly, the tour dates will be announced later this week. SEE YOU IN THE PIT!

2017 Grammys Rundown: Who Won, Who Should’ve Won, and More Angry Thoughts

If you’re anything other than the most casual, Kool Aid-chugging Z100 listener, you’re probably aware that the Grammys suck massive amounts of dick a good amount of the time. I’m not going to get myself all worked up here with a Grammy Awards: Cluelessness and Disrespect 101 history lesson, but you get my point. (Side note: Sometimes I wonder if film buffs feel the same about the Oscars, but I’m as fair weather a moviegoer as they come, so if that’s the case, I’m part of the problem.)

Of course I love music too much to look away, and every year my morbid curiosity gets the best of me.Here’s a cathartic synopsis of some of my most primitive thoughts: the right decisions, the wrong decisions, and some additional commentary about the show itself. So I’ll begin with a dissection of the categories relevant to this blog, and end with a bunch of self-absorbed opinions. Enjoy!

Category: Album of the Year

Winner: 25 – Adele

Who Should’ve Won: Lemonade – Beyonce

Why: Ask Adele. She’ll tell you.

 

Category: Song of the Year

Winner: Hello – Adele

Who Should’ve Won: Hello – Adele

Why: Despite my personal distaste for it, “Hello” has been a ubiquitous radio monster for the last 18 months, and with its success we saw Adele reach an even higher echelon of stardom than on her tremendous 21 album cycle.

 

Category: Best New Artist

Winner: Chance The Rapper

Who Should’ve Won: Anderson .Paak

Why: Chance is not NEW you fucking idiots. Since Acid Rap dropped in 2013, he has been the de facto face of independent Hip-Hop and a massively influential force in the industry’s ever-evolving approach to music distribution. But hey, I guess when you’re half a decade behind, he IS new.

 

Category: Best Pop Duo/Group Performance

Winner: “Stressed Out” – Twenty One Pilots

Who Should’ve Won: “Stressed Out” – Twenty One Pilots

Why: So we could see one of the best acceptance speeches of all time.

 

Category: Best Pop Vocal Album

Winner: 25 – Adele

Who Should’ve Won: Dangerous Woman – Ariana Grande

Why: Beyonce may have had the artfulness and critically acclaim, but Ariana had the hits! Not just one or two, but a whole album full of them! Like it or not, Dangerous Woman is such a flawlessly executed Pop record that it’s still dominating airwaves EIGHT MONTHS after its release.

 

 Category: Best Pop Solo Performance

Winner: “Hello” – Adele

Who Should’ve Won: “Dangerous Woman” – Ariana Grande

Why: Far and away the better song! Plus, it was so cool to hear some bluesy guitars make it onto the charts.

 

 

Category: Best Rock Song

Winner: “Blackstar” – David Bowie

Who Should’ve Won: “Blackstar” – David Bowie

Why: Even though this is classic “better-late-than-never” posthumous appreciation from a clueless institution, “Blackstar” is an amazing song. Radiohead’s “Burn the Witch” gets a close second here.

 

 Category: Best Rock Performance

Winner: “Blackstar” – David Bowie

Who Should’ve Won: “Blackstar” – David Bowie

Why: What a joke that Bowie’s competition for best ROCK performance was a fucking Beyonce song and Disturbed’s Simon & Garfunkel cover. Fuck the Grammys.

 

 Category: Best Metal Performance

Winner: “Dystopia” – Megadeth

Who Should’ve Won: “Dystopia” – Megadeth

Why: Would’ve been happy with Megadeth, Baroness, or Gojira on this one. All three are favorites of mine! The Grammys are so historically clueless with Metal that you just hope the dice land in a reasonable place (i.e. NOT Motorhead winning for a Metallica cover, or Tenacious D beating out Slipknot, Mastodon, Motorhead, and Anthrax).

 

Category: Best Rock Album

Winner: Tell Me I’m Pretty – Cage the Elephant

Who Should’ve Won: Weezer – Weezer

Why: Weezer was a Top 5 Album for me last year. Cage…maybe in the top….300? Haha. Oh, and Gojira is not a “rock band” guys. The Grammys’ ignorance would almost be cute if it wasn’t so upsetting

 

Category: Best Urban Contemporary Album

Winner: Lemonade – Beyonce

Who Should’ve Won: Lemonade – Beyonce

Why:

 

Category: Best Rap Album

Winner: Coloring Book – Chance the Rapper

Who Should’ve Won: The Life of Pablo – Kanye West

Why: MASSIVE respect to Chance for his much deserved win! Couldn’t be happier for him. It’s a big moment in Grammys history since Coloring Book is a “free project” and all. I just preferred TLOP.

 

Category: Best Rap Performance

Winner: “No Problem” – Chance the Rapper

Who Should’ve Won: “No Problem” – Chance the Rapper

Why: One Summer ‘16’s most irresistible and inescapable bangers. Blows the other four nominees out of the water (let’s face it, the nominees themselves are the real issue a lot of the time).

 

Category: Best Rap song

Winner: “Hotline Bling” – Drake

Who Should’ve Won: “Famous” – Kanye West feat. Rihanna

Why: Drake did crush it with “Hotline Bling”. He really did. But it’s another in a long line of petty bitter ex-boyfriend-isms from Drizzy that glorify controlling, chauvinistic nonsense. So I guess I’ll go with the less concealed chauvinism on “Famous”.

 

Category: Best Rap/Sung Performance

Winner: “Hotline Bling” – Drake

Who Should’ve Won: “Hotline Bling” – Drake

Why: I HAVE to give him this. Much more appropriate in this category anyway ‘cause he’s barely even “rapping” on this track.

 

Some More Thoughts:

  • A Tribe Called Quest’s performance was one of the greatest moments in Grammy history. So powerful, so true to their legacy, and so NEEDED. Please watch it if you haven’t yet! They call Trump “President Agent Orange” on national television.
  • Say what you want about Adele beating out Beyonce, but to her credit, she did a HELLUVA better job being a white apologist than Macklemore did when he beat out Kendrick. I still cringe so hard when I think about that.
  • The Chainsmokers need to go away. I’m praying that they’re relevant by the 2018 show. Unfortunately I’m an Atheist, so Closer 3.0 and Closer 4.0 might be up for some awards next year (Closer 2.0 is “Paris”, in case you’re wondering).
  • Twenty One Pilots gave one of the most memorable, touching acceptance speeches I’ve ever seen. Though I’m beginning to grow out of their music, I’m so happy for those guys and all their much deserved success.
  •  Putting aside the two things that everybody was upset about – James Hetfield’s mic being turned off and the tranny forgetting to mention Metallica’s name when he/she introduced them – the Metallica/Lady GaGa collaboration was fucking wack. Having been not only a fan of GaGa, but aware of her unabashed Metal fandom for quite some, I had high hopes, but it was as awkward and forced as an Anakin/Padme love scene in Attack of the Clones. Bummed me the hell out.
  • Lastly, to all you Metalheads getting your studs and leather in a wad over this shit – the Grammys have NEVER showed one iota of respect towards the genre. This is not new. You can get as pissed as you want, but what you should really do is focus your attention on bigging up the true METAL awards shows hosted by REAL members of the faithful like Revolver and Metal Hammer. Let’s put our energy into making these awards shows a cornerstone of the genre! Forget the Grammys. In Metal, when you’re not invited to the party, you start your own.

 

 

 

January 2017 Album Round Up!

Greetings to all you lovebirds out there 😉

If you’ve got a special someone in your life, hope you and your bank account are gearing up for some good ol’ Valentine’s Day lovin’ next week . If that special someone is still finding their way to you, or if they already did and you fucking blew it, hope the ice cream, tears, and rom com re-runs are good to you. But for most of the single guys out there, hope you enjoy another typical Tuesday with a pointless cultural label where getting laid might be slightly easier.

As for me, I hope to spend Valentine’s Day VERY erotically – listening to that new Marilyn Manson record he’s hinted at (literally the opposite of coincidentally) releasing on that day. It’s supposed to be called Say10. If that title doesn’t strike a chord with you, slowly pronounce it out loud until it clicks. Don’t worry, it took me an embarrassing amount of time to put two and two together, too.

So while you make the necessary preparations (read: purchases) for a drama-free and sex-filled Valentine’s Day, here are some thoughts on what the first month of 2017 had to offer music-wise! We’re off to a pretty good start if you ask me!

Forever – Code Orange

 The hottest act in Metalcore unleashed their third record this month to frenzied excitement. Me? Just a contrarian son of a bitch, I guess. I LIKE album – furious cuts like “Real”, “Spy” and the title track are bone-crushing rushes of adrenaline, and my biggest praise is the LP’s mindboggling variety, with “Bleeding In the Blur” bringing some melodic Post-Hardcore to the table and “Ugly” fusing together ‘90s Alt-Rock with gruff Hard Rock – but the barrage of not-so-special breakdowns does get tiresome and a couple cuts (“The Mud”, “Hurt Goes On”) miss their mark. So yeah. Cool record but I didn’t go head-over-heels for it like everybody else did. Here is a full review. RECOMMENDED

Vessels – Starset

 I went against the grain with this new Starset record too, the band’s second. Vessels fuses together Electronic Music, Butt Rock, and some djent-y modern Metalcore for a sugar sweet but unfulfilling outing full of excessively angsty hooks, non-guitar riffs, and such a thick layer of production that it’s impossible to tell if a single thing is performed by a human being. It’s unbelievably catchy at points, and I understand the appeal, but it’s not gonna be anything more than an occasional guilty pleasure for me. Here is a full review. NOT RECOMMENDED

Return of the Cool – Nick Grant

After stumbling across this Billboard article on Nick Grant last year, Return of the Cool quickly became one of my most anticipated debuts of 2017. With the momentum the 28-year-old Grant has behind him right now, I was ready to bear witness to the meteoric rise of Hip-Hop’s next breakout star – and most of all, I was ready to hear soul and lyricism reinstated in Southern Hip-Hop (not to say I dislike what’s going on down there right now, but, I did grow up with ATLIENS as my bible). On Return of the Cool, the South Carolina native shows some promise and a bit of an old school flair, but the project disappointed the hell out of me. The painfully generic “Bouncin’” could’ve been made by ANY of Grant’s contemporaries (Logic, J. Cole, Big Sean Kendrick, etc.). And despite references to icons like Lauryn Hill and Nas, Grant doesn’t do much to uphold their standards with lines like “curves driving me crazy, I need some counseling”. NOT RECOMMENDED

The Search For Everything (Wave One) – John Mayer

 My fellow Pretentious Fairfield County, CT Douchebag is employing an adventurous and exciting release strategy for his seventh LP – he’s releasing four songs at a time in monthly “waves”. In the uncertain and uneasy free-for-all that is music promotion in 2017, I’m so glad to see someone with Mayer’s clout try a different approach. As for the music on “Wave One”? Simply put, three out of four songs connected for me. Most notably, however, I was psyched to see Mayer take a break from the genre gymnastics of his last few releases and just pen some straight ahead, no frills Pop tunes. Here is a full review. RECOMMENDED

Machine Messiah – Sepultura

 Growing up, I thought all you had to know about Sepultura occurred in the less-than-4-hour combined run time of Beneath the Remains, Chaos A.D., Arise, and Roots. I still sorta feel that way, but I was curious to hear Machine Messiah, which is now the band’s eighth (!) as Sepultura 2.0 since Derrick Green took over on vocals in 1997 (by comparison, they only made six LPs with Max Cavalera). So I felt behind.And I gotta say, I’m impressed with this current incarnation’s mix of Thrash, Groove Metal, a bit of Extreme Metal,, and the most thrilling surprise, a symphonic element on tracks like “Sworn Oath” and “Resistant Parasites”! Worth checking out if you’re like me and have only ever known “classic Sepultura”. Here is a full review. RECOMMENDED

 Culture – Migos

Around 20 million people were watching the Golden Globes when, two weeks before the release of their sophomore album, Donald Glover unexpectedly shouted out the Migos during an acceptance speech (his PHENOMENAL tv show Atlanta took home two awards that night). And with Culture, it’s safe to say the Migos are seizing their moment in the sun. This LP is the EPITOME of the Atlanta-based trap sound: Quavo, Offset, and Takeoff hop on these knocking instrumentals (one of the best collections of trap beats I have ever heard) with colorful ad-libs, tons of charisma, and memorable refrains. I mean, how could you not just throw on a track like “T-Shirt” or “Call Casting” and vibe out? Historically , I’m into Rap like this, so I’m gonna need some more time with it, but Culture just might be an unexpected 2017 favorite. RECOMMENDED

Gods of Violence – Kreator

 On album number fourteen from the legendary German thrashers, they delivered a collection of powerhouse Metal anthems and did so without being restricted by that old school Thrash “leash” that some of their veteran peers seem to be hindered by. As with its predecessor Phantom Antichrist, Gods of Violence draws on not just Thrash but Melodic Death Metal, streaks of classic NWOBHM, and a bit of lyrical inspiration from Viking Metal for a well-rounded listen. Here is a full review. HIGHLY RECOMMENDED

I See You – The xx

The third LP from these British indie poppers is chalk full of seductive nocturnal vibes that range from slightly spacey (“A Violent Noise”) to hipster nightclub-y (“Dangerous”) to just plain heart-wrenching (“Performance). While these guys’ music has never really “clicked” with me, I actually found myself enjoying a good chunk of this album! Unfortunately, one thing that bugs me is how overwhelmingly seriously these guys take themselves – at times, they oversell their emotions in an almost histrionic fashion that leaves me feeling a bit drained, like I’m not allowed to enjoy myself or something. Plus, Romy and Oliver just AREN’T the best singers from a technical standpoint. But it’s still a solid LP, definitely The xx’s best yet! RECOMMENDED

AFI (The Blood Album) – AFI

 Call it nostalgia, call it glass half full, call it “a retard who knows nothing about anything” like you all love to do on YouTube, but AFI fucking BROUGHT it this time around, in a way they haven’t in over a decade! I’m serious. “White Offerings” is PURE Sing the Sorrow (the band’s landmark 2003 release – a childhood favorite of mine), while the sharp riffing in “Hidden Knives” does the song’s title justice, and tracks like “Pink Eyes” and “Snow Cats” have all the makings of hit songs (particularly the latter, with its irresistible call-and-response chorus). I’m just shocked at how into this record I am. The Blood Album is the OGs sending the new bucks back to the drawing board. These songs completely justify my endless shit talking about all these wack ass “emo” bands that are coming up on Warped Tour – this is what they should shoot for. A thoughtful melding of Punk, Post-Hardcore, and Hard Rock, The Blood Album proves that AFI still set the standard. HIGHLY RECOMMENDED

Migration – Bonobo

As easy on the ears as this record is, it DOES tend to drift to the background as you listen to it. The gentle, serene touch of “Break Apart” and the ambience of “Grains” are some of the most pleasant sounds you’re likely to hear from Electronic Music all year, but Migration is not the most outwardly engaging of listens. Of course, you could take that in whatever connotation you’d like! ‘Cause I don’t have any “critiques” here – just my personal experience with this LP, which is that it’s a more passive listen than his early works like Dial “M” for Monkey, which was my favorite album when I was sixteen. Don’t get me wrong – there’s a lot to like here, and it’s 100 percent worth a listen, but it hasn’t gotten much repeated love from me. RECOMMENDED

John Mayer – The Search For Everything: Wave One EP Review

John Mayer is one of those people whose so brilliant you can’t really blame him for being kind of a douche. His mastery of the Pop hook, his chops as a guitar player, his genre elasticity and the all-around adventurous spirit with which he approaches music…he’s easy to hate but equally easy to admire. After detours into Country and Folk with his last two LPs – 2013’s exceptional Paradise Valley and the previous year’s solid-but-less-exceptional Born & Raised – Mayer is one of the artists whose new tunes I’ve been most anxiously anticipating.

Wave One of The Search For Everything (which is Mayer’s seventh full length) is the official kick off of an exciting, unorthodox release strategy in which the Connecticut-born “recovering ego addict” will drop four songs a month until the whole LP is completely“ out”. A n intriguing approach from one of the elite “so-successful-he can-do-whatever-he-wants” members of the industry.

Reviewing four short songs is, well, exactly that. It’s basically four intertwined track reviews. So we might as well start with “Love on the Weekend”, the lead single Mayer premiered back in November. This track is a resurrection of the warm, intimate Rom-Com relatability of his debut Room for Squares – Mayer sings matter-of-factly about the every day ins and outs of relationships and packages it with bubbly melodies like only a Pop genius like him can. He makes romance sound so effortless and so casual with a lovely, soft-spoken piano line that’s accentuated by sleek stabs of clean guitars.

“Love on the Weekend” definitely feels like a deliberate, conscious return to simplicity for the songwriter – Mayer’s music hasn’t sounded this stripped down in over a decade (though the quaint Born & Raised was similarly straightforward – just in a whole new style, mind you.) I can only fault it for being TOO MUCH of a “Pandora station for a froyo shop” type song. It’s pleasant as can be, but it does have a certain wallpaper quality to it.

The opening cut “Moving On and Getting Over” is a much more interesting affair. Stylistically it’s an intersection of Heavier Things and Continuum. What immediately caught my attention is Mayer’s use of octave vocal harmonies in the verses – the harmonizing pitches are so far apart that it creates the illusion of two separate singers in two separate moods trying to express the same thing. It’s a fucking cool effect. Lyrically, it’s an understated meditation on the aftermath of a break up – the point where you THINK you’re ready to move on but you’re still, as John himself puts it, “One text away from being back again”. And the funky guitars that accompany these sentiments tie a neat little bow around a superb song.

But it’s the tender, heartwarming piano ballad “You’re Gonna Live Forever in Me” that steals the show. There’s something so wistful about Mayer’s performance as he whistles his way through an unforgettable melody with one particularly beautiful chromatic passing tone (in laymen’s terms: that one note that doesn’t sound like it “fits”). And there’s one lyric that practically brings me to tears: “Life is full of sweet mistakes/and love’s an honest one to make”. Just so glad John Mayer thought of it first and not Nicholas Sparks or some other hokey sap.

Unfortunately, the one BIG dip in quality is “Changes”, which could’ve easily found a nice, comfy spot on the cutting room floor. It’s bland and predictable, with a refrain that isn’t strong enough to be repeated as many times as it is. And let’s not even begin to dissect this gem: “ I see the sky changing/it reminds me of my changing”. Ugh, what the fuck. But hey, I’m not at all mad at that Stevie Ray Vaughan-esque guitar tone in the solo though!

To be honest, it’s tough to review a small fourteen-minute chunk of a record. ‘Cause fascinatingly enough, even though “Wave One” had some mixed results (Mayer batted .750 with me if you’re keeping score), if the next three “Waves” – or however many it ends up being – are super consistent, then that still adds up to a great album! So we’ll see. I certainly commend John Mayer for throwing us all for a loop, and it’s going to make my job that much more delightfully puzzling in the coming months. Until Wave Two, John!

Lupe Fiasco’s “DROGAS Light”: Four Singles Deep

As I mentioned in my last post, next month Alleged Jew-Hater-Turned-Rap-Retiree Lupe Fiasco will be dropping a follow-up to 2015’s highly acclaimed Tetsuo & Youth, rumors and click bait be damned. A fan of Lupe’s for almost a decade, I’m as excited as I am curious to check out and review the LP, titled DROGAS Light, out February 10th. And in the past couple weeks, Lupe has now unchained more than a quarter of the 14-song tracklist for our listening pleasure via Apple Music, Spotify, and YouTube.

I almost fucking missed it. I WOULD’VE fucking missed it, actually, if I hadn’t noticed “Jump” make an appearance on Apple Music’s “hot tracks” list. And so I immediately diverted my attention (from reviewing Sepultura’s Machine Messiah – coming this week on my YouTube channel) and JUMPED in, horrible pun intended.

Made in the USA (feat. Bianca Sings)

Production-wise the most “stereotypical mainstream Hip-Hop” of these tracks (possibly on purpose), “Made in the USA” might be the most energetic I’ve ever heard Lupe on a track. Lupe’s delivery is always sleek and graceful, even when the subject matter gets intense. But here, he’s fucking hype. It is tongue-and-check? Probably, because as long time fans will likely recognize, he spits these lyrics with a familiar politically-charged facetiousness – one can only assume he’s not actually that proud to be an American right now. Especially since him and Colonel Sanders aren’t on such good terms– he mentions that “KFC is trying to kill me”, and whenever a fast food chain is coming for your head, you’ve seen better days. Kidding aside, “Made in the USA” is a confusing listen in the way that a track like “Bitch Bad” is – it SOUNDS like a banger, but ‘cause Lupe clearly wants you to dig deeper, you practically feel guilty enjoying it at a surface level. And that’s why this is my least favorite of the four songs.

 Jump (feat. Gizzle)

“Jump” – which, given its lack of an impactful hook, is surprisingly the most popular of the bunch – is partially cut from the “A Milli” cloth: rapidly repeated vocal sample, booming bassline, and lots of space for stream-of-consciousness bars. But it’s actually a story track, and if you follow along, it gets pretty damn weird – the protagonist and his new female companion get abducted by aliens, and she (“she” meaning lesbian fem-C Gizzle, who has written for TONS of big name rappers) talks about sampling some…alien pussy. But it’s entertaining through and through, and I like it a lot. Is there some symbolism behind the female character in the story, or maybe the entire plot itself? I’m sure there is, but I’ll leave it to the more pretentious listeners to sort that out.

Pick up the Phone

Listening to this track, I can’t help but wonder if it would’ve boosted the success of Lupe’s heavily criticized third LP Lasers, his detour into Pop-Rap. In a way, this one’s got all the elements of a formulaic Pop chorus – acoustic guitars, simple radio-friendly chord progression, easily digestible vocal melody courtesy of Sebastian Lundberg, and some strings to add a tinge of drama. But the difference is it’s good. Really good, actually. By his standards, Lupe’s lyrics might be a tad disposable, but he flows in a way that’s friendly to Hip-Hop fans and mainstream listeners alike. We’ll see if this one can cross over. Also, the intro to the beat is reminiscent of “Superstar”, so it’s got that going for it.

Wild Child (feat. Jake Torrey)

Like “Pick Up the Phone”, “Wild Child” is another poppy affair, venturing even further in that direction. I’ll say this much: if the God damn radio doesn’t pick up on this song, I might hurt someone. Or have a stroke. Or hurt someone, then have a stroke. It’s so fucking catchy. “Wild Child” not only has a lot going for it musically – perky guitars, spunky bass lines, and a danceable, swinging groove in the chorus – it exudes a beautifully carefree vibe, and “carefree” is not a word you can use to describe ANY of Lupe’s music, really. Sure, the song’s Summer-y vibes might not fit the current mid-January climate, but who cares! I’m looking forward to having this as a sleeper song for pregames when girls are around.

Ten Albums I’m Anticipating in 2017

Annnd here we are! Another new year, another 365 days of people moping about how awful it is. To be fair, 2016 did give 2017 quite the head start in that category, but I always prefer to be optimistic. Being a whiney whore on social media is too easy. I like a challenge.

Musically, I wouldn’t be surprised if we saw a bit of a drop off in 2017, ‘cause, let’s face it, who DIDN’T come out with an awesome new album in the past two years?? 2015 and 2016 were overwhelming, in the best way imaginable.

But this damn industry always finds a way. And since New Year’s, I’ve been steadily adding to my 2017 release date calendar, salivating at the chance to review and talk about these mysterious LPs that, at the moment, are nothing but titles on a word doc.

So here are ten of those records, all of which are CONFIRMED to come out this year. Being speculative is a waste of time. Sure, Tool MIGHT drop an album before 2017 is over, but I’d rather focus my attention on the “sure things”. Like going to a bar and only talking to girls with tramp stamps.

And one more quick clarification: these albums aren’t necessarily “anticipated” ‘cause I think they’re gonna be good – some I’m just curious to hear! Big difference there!

Can hardly contain my excitement for this new Kreator LP Gods of Violence, which drops in a couple weeks (January 27th). This might be THE major Metal release of January for me. I haven’t kept up with every Kreator album (which they crank out like clockwork), but I’ve never been disappointed by what I’ve heard, so high hopes for this one!

The following week, Big Sean is dropping an album called I Decided. According to him, it’s his “most ambitious one yet” or some other PR nonsense. I always have a morbid curiosity with new Big Sean music, ‘cause there’s a small part of me that thinks the guy’s genuinely talented and wants to see him pull through with a dope project. But it never happens. We’ll have to see…

Hip-Hop’s most pretentious (alleged) Jew hater, Lupe Fiasco, will be dropping Drogas Light on February 10th, following up 2015’s excellent Tetsuo & Youth. Growing up, I worshipped this man. Nowadays, his bars make me feel like I’m being talked down to. But Tetsuo was undeniably great so I can’t wait to hear its successor.

After that T Swift covers album got him heaps more (deserved) recognition, I’m looking forward to what singer/songwriter Ryan Adams has in store for his new LP Prisoner. Check out Love is Hell if you haven’t yet. The guy is unreal.

Everyone has that criminally underrated band from their childhood that they’ll never stop yelling about. For me, that’s Darkest Hour, the unsung heroes of the New Wave of American Heavy Metal who quietly put out two classics (2003’s Undoing Ruin and 2005’s Deliver Us) while Trivium and Lamb of God hogged the spotlight. Though I did get a little vindication when “District Divided”, one of my favorite songs, got 30 seconds of screen time in The Big Short. But I digress

This upcoming record Godless Prophets and the Migrant Flora is the result of a crowd-funding campaign and after Sumerian Records ruined their last album, I’ve got my fingers crossed for a return to form. The title is certainly epic.

Since I’m a HUGE proponent of Metal and Hip-Hop intermingling (even at the cost of Limp Bizkit existing), Ice-T’s Metal band Body Count is always on my radar. Their sixth LP Bloodlust is on its way this St. Patty’s Day. Given that “Pop Bubble”, featuring Hatebreed frontman Jamey Jasta, was far and away the standout track on 2014’s Manslaughter, it’s gonna be Jasta Collab or Bust. Just kidding.

My tears still haven’t quite dried up from the break up of legendary Black Metal band Agalloch last year, but frontman John Haughm is back! His new band is called Pillorian and the record – out March 10th – is called Obsidian Arc. Let us pray to the Black Metal Gods for some continued quality from Mr. Haughm. I can only listen to The Mantle and Marrow of the Spirit so many hundreds of times.

Oh, and Mastodon have confirmed a seventh full-length for 2017! It doesn’t have a title yet, but as far as this obnoxious blogger goes, it sure as shit has an audience! I can’t fucking wait – 2014’s Once More ‘Round the Sun might’ve been my favorite of the band’s six records.

The ever-elusive Wintersun is – I kid you not – ACTUALLY dropping an album. The band’s third in a 13-year career….but, I swear it’s happening. Take a look hereThe Forest Seasons is a title that’s floating around out there, but who knows. Here’s what I DO know: this will be one of the most talked about Metal albums of 2017.

And, last but not least, John Mayer is returning to the limelight with The Search for Everything. And an interesting release strategy , I might add. A Mayer fanboy from early on in life, I’ll be there every step of the way.

December 2016 Album Round Up!

I don’t care what anyone says – the last month of 2016 belonged to Hip-Hop. In the 11 months prior, every other genre had seemingly said all they had to say, but a legion of brilliant MCs, beat makers, and (hopefully not too many) ghostwriters were just getting started.

I.E. The hare that was the rest of the music biz had all but settled in for 2017, and Hip-Hop was the ultimate tortoise. And for me, this is not even COUNTING the surprise Christmas Eve release of the highly anticipated Run The Jewels 3 album – I can wait ‘til the official date in January for that (I think).

And I’m glad that I didn’t have a crazy influx of new music to deal with, ‘cause I was so God damn busy with my year-end lists that it would’ve been too much to handle anyway. I needed to debate Frank Ocean vs. Beyonce for hours on end in peace.

Anyway, I’m beyond psyched to see what 2017 has in store for us (anticipated albums coming next!), and I’m gonna enjoy turning my eye toward the future once again, ‘cause List Season is all about the retrospective. But before I turn forward, here’s one more look back – eight albums that I was bumping in between year-end list work:

Passion, Pain, & Demon Slayin’ – Kid Cudi

Hands down the best Kid Cudi project since 2010’s Man on the Moon 2: The Legend of Mr. Rager. If you’re a longtime Cudi fan, I bet you’re LOVING this. Unfortunately, there are a couple things holding me back from an overall positive verdict. A) this thing is an incredibly bloated 86 minutes – Frustratingly, a lot of said 86 minutes consists of Cudi ruining otherwise great tracks by dragging them out for unnecessary lengths. B) it’s excessively mopey at times – and “mopey” as in minus the self-destructive charisma of the “moping” on his first two records. But FUCK ME if there isn’t a killer album in here somewhere! Getting some dope, vibed-out production from the likes of Dot da Genius, Plain Pat, and Pharrell definitely helped – I love the spacey beats on tracks like “ILLusions”,”Swim in the Light”, and the Travis Scott-assisted lead single “Baptized in Fire”. And “By Design” is one of the top 5 tracks of Cudi’s entire career. I swear, one of these days this guy’s gonna drop a FIRE project front to back. I can feel it. But not this one. NOT RECOMMENDED

4 Your Eyez Only – J. Cole

I fucking hate J. Cole’s fans. J. Cole’s fans ruined (the stuff I did like by) J. Cole for me. They tried to act like JUST because there was a loose concept to this album – Cole’s fourth – anybody who didn’t like it must feel that way ‘cause it’s “over their head” and they’re JUST NOT SMART ENOUGH. What a crock of shit. 4 Your Eyez Only does have a cool (easy to follow!) storyline, and it has a few phenomenal tracks like “Neighbors” and the tear-jerking title track, but it has a major momentum problem. Too much mopey crooning, too much underwhelming lyricism, and an abomination called “Foldin’ Clothes”. However, I did enjoy the strong cuts enough to grant it a 6/10. But no, dickriders, it’s not a “classic”. FOH with that. Here is a full review. RECOMMENDED

Awaken, My Love! – Childish Gambino

Donald Glover is CRUSHING it right now. The other night, his critically acclaimed TV series Atlanta got hella more critically acclaimed when it took home a pair of Golden Globes; he’s playing Lando Calrissian in the upcoming Star Wars film; AND he dropped Awaken, My Love! – this total stylistic left turn of a record – out of nowhere. DAMN. If you haven’t heard the LP yet, Glover abandoned rapping altogether and hopped in a time machine back to the mid-70s for some George Clinton-inspired funk and soul jams. I’d be full of shit if I said I was well-versed in this genre of music, but I would not be full of shit if I said I enjoyed what I heard, and that I’m continually impressed with Glover’s versatility. RECOMMENDED

Not the Actual Events EP – Nine Inch Nails

With this quick little Christmastime EP, these Industrial Rock legends have finally crawled out of their three-year cave to (hopefully) give us a taste of what they have in store for us on their highly anticipated ninth full-length. In other words, they’re lubricating their audience (pause). A good chunk of what’s on here is classic Nine Inch Nails though. Exhibit A: the electronic grooves on highlight “Dear World” that are nearly danceable but still ominous and foreboding. I’m especially into the track “The Idea of You”, which has these off-kilter machine gun rhythms that are addicting as hell. Ultimately, it’s all just a teaser though, like the full theater trailer for a summer blockbuster. But this thing has me excited for a new Nine Inch Nails studio album (fingers crossed) this year. RECOMMENDED

White Friday (CM9) – Yo Gotti

While every other music nerd spent Christmas Eve freaking out about the Run the Jewels surprise release, I was bumping this mixtape, lured by the explosive single “Power of Money”. Gotti continues to impress me. He’s clearly a street rapper, but there’s a certain elegance to him – he spits with the self-assurance of an OG with nothing to prove, but with the hunger of an MC half his age. He also gets surprisingly sentimental on the closing track “What Happened”, which is dedicated to his friend and manager Mel Carter, who passed away a few weeks before this tape came out. Here is a full review. HIGHLY RECOMMENDED.

 Don’t Smoke Rock – Smoke DZA & Pete Rock

 Harlem MC Smoke DZA teamed up with one of the greatest Hip-Hop producers of all time for a beautifully old school Hip-Hop record, one rooted purely in the ‘90s. Don’t Smoke Rock was so up my alley, it almost feels like it was made specifically for me. I’m giving the top 3 features to Jadakiss, Royce da 5’9, and Big K.R.I.T – they all crushed it. Here is a full review. RECOMMENDED

Darkness and Light – John Legend

So this is the first time I’ve given a full John Legend project a shot. Maybe this style of (mostly) lethargic R & B just isn’t my cup of tea, but these 45 minutes elicited more yawns than anything else. That’s not to say the LP is without its undeniable high points: the funky Chance the Rapper collaboration “Penthouse Floor” is awesome – Chance’s verse on that one, much like himself, is quirky, fun, and imaginative – but my personal favorite is the sensual “Temporarily Painless”. It’s one of my favorite songs right now. It’s SO.DAMN.SEXY, between its dreamy production and Legend’s airtight songwriting – I just can’t get enough. Overall, Darkness and Light is a decent listen for a rainy day, but I’ve found myself coming back to a few select tracks rather than the whole LP. NOT RECOMMENDED

Filthy America…It’s Beautiful – The Lox

No, this hugely anticipated comeback record did not meet my extremely overinflated expectations. The Lox’s 1998 debut Money, Power, & Respect was one of my Hip-Hop bibles growing up, and Jadakiss was always a favorite of mine. Unfortunately, the issue with Filthy America seems to be an identity crisis. This LP doesn’t know whether it wants to be traditionalist (the Premo-produced “Move Forward”) or fit in with the young’ns (the generic trap turn-up of “Secure the Bag”). So it winds up being a disjointed listen. Aside from one gem – the menacing Mobb Deep collab “Hard Life” – I think I’ll stick with Money, Power, & Respect. NOT RECOMMENDED